Commitment Avoider Pillows

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

You fled to Canada because you're afraid of marrying me? Well, I ... I understand, Sadie. Really? Of course. How do you think I feel? You? Being the constant object of your lust. You're not helping.

'I'm not looking for a meaningful relationship, so don't tell me your name.'

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'No, but thanks for asking,'

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

'Is that 'forsaking all others' bit compulsory?'

'Or you can rent by the week...'

"Instead of making a long-term commitment to marriage, I've decided to lease a man."

"I really like this one – but I'm afraid of getting hurt again."

'Don't try to sweet talk me, Eddie! You had your chance yesterday! We are through!'

Hello, Susie, it's R

Man playing with echos: 'Hellooooo...How are you....I love you...' 'I'm not ready for that kind of committment!'

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

"I never get a girls name tattooed on a first date."

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

'I do - allowing for a 50 margin of error...'

"I'm sorry son, was that, 'I do', or 'please kill me'?"

'Well, yes, when you put it that way, I am a selfish male afraid of commitment, but 'Lone Wolf' sounds better...'

Dating Death

List of things to do today. Make list of things to do tomorrow.

'I don't know, Randy - Marriage is so INTRUSIVE.'

"And you're telling me this because?"

"Bernie has fear of commitment - He thinks the American Psychiatric Association is out to get him."

'Are you sure you want to save your marriage?'

"These oaths aren't binding all weekend are they?"

"Or you could just give me half your stuff now and save us all the trouble."

"Would it have killed you to shave first?"

'What d'you mean - you've changed your minds?'

'And do you Emily, take George as your lawful partner until death, or the cute guy in accounts, do you part!'

"The phone number is her idea. I think she wants to split up."

'I'm going to be a lot more decisive from now on. Well... maybe not a lot more, but at least a little more.'

'Don't you think having a relationship might put a stain on our relationship?'