Commerce T-Shirts

'Our strategy is perfect! This is the customers' fault - they don't think the way WE do!'

Business man at desk, "My family? Hell no, those are my clients"

"We lowered the sticker price from here to here."

Mal's mail order boomerang service was never a big success.

'I hope you're not going to get into my bad books by asking me for a raise Digby.'

You wouldn't believe how close I came to bankruptcy last year.

London merchant telling a young employee that if he does not change his behaviour his career will go badly and he may end up becoming mayor

"I really hate sales meetings"

Little Grannies Homebaked Cookies.

Personally, I prefer the stick to the carrot. I tried threatening them with a carrot once, and it didn't work worth a damn.

'I'm sorry, Mr. Frobisher is emotionally unavailable right now.'

The way I look at it...give a man a fish and you got a potential customer. Teach a man to fish and you lose market share.

Men placing an advertisement in search of a naive investor

Supply Chain

I'm on a productivity drive.

P. Watkins Auctioneer: Going, Going, Gone.

'Yes, that is me. We're a very new company.'

"You must admit, so far we've done pretty well for not yet having a product line."

High end of the market...

Till malfunction

"We're all in the same boat, except it's more like a life raft than an actual boat."

'Today: Whale of a sale!'

'Well, if none of you have anything to say we may as well knock off early and go home.'

"He sold his fresh water before it melted."

"Nothing teaches a businessman Spanish faster...than a Latino with a dollar bill."

Sales Chart: Boomerangs LTD

First-Customer-Earned

"The people who hate trucks as environmentally destructive traffic obstacles and think that drivers are grubby idiots are waiting for their goods!"

"Before we made the leap to cyberspace, our stockholders made us promise we'd maintain a traditional street presence, too!"

'A look into the future.'

"It's not my fault! Tariffs on lemon imports have forced me to increase my prices."

Following the Cash Crop

"There are the arts, the sciences, agriculture, and commerce. Stick with commerce, if you know what's good for you."

"My God—I've forgotten the number of my Swiss bank account!"

'Carlo Khan's Triumphal Entry into Leadenhall St.' - Respose to Charles James Fox's India Bill