Commanding Officers Gifts

'Just kidding, sargent

Neo-International Law

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

"Postwar is hell."

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

'This one's for marrying him, and this one's for raising the kids.'

Military Medals

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

'I was in a camouflage unit, so this one is for Hide and Seek.'

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

'General, please hire large armies of foreign mercenaries to complete the works of death, desolation and tyranny.'

"The first one is for graduating from basic training. The rest are classified."

'I got this one for thinking outside the box.'

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

"How come you always take Amnesty International's side?"

'At ease, soldier.'

UNFADED GLORY

"He wanted a heavily decorated cake for his birthday."

Lost around a military base.

Moustached gentleman

'Wouldn't it be cheaper to apologise to the Middle East?'

Happy Labour Day: While you enjoy that last long weekend of summer, remember...there are some folks who aren't taking the weekend off.

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

Defence Cutbacks.

Family Salutes as Father Comes Home.

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

"I'm returning home triumphant - do you need me to pick anything up?"

"Pinpoint havoc, gentlemen, accuracy of mayhem. And yet our dress blues remain crisp and sharp, our hands soft and pink."

"What you find 'boring' spies from all over the world would find extremely interesting."