Comical Shark Fan Gifts

"I really need to start carrying some wasabi."

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

The Food Chain

"Heads or tails?"

A man gets a paper cut while reading in his back yard and is attacked by 'Lawn Sharks'.

'Why can't you collect shells like the other kids?'

'I haven't been able to go to sleep in this new bowl.'

"Sir, our hood ornament is slowing us down."

Early design for the Two-Man Kayak.

"The reason you're not popular is...well...you smell like shark repellant."

"Everybody out of the water! Lawyer!"

"What on earth were you thinking when you named your boat?"

"Oh, he claims I bit his head off, did he? And I suppose you BELIEVED him?"

"What do you mean, 'Climate change is not just humbug?'"

"You're goin' up the river, Sammy."

Shark swimming in a bathtub surrounded by blood.

'Wait a second! This fish is made out of TOFU!'

"It's odd, but once I'm full, the last thing I want to smell is blood in the water."

Shark in the swimming pool.

Whale Pattern Balding

"We're saved! We're saved!"

'Yeah, Pilot-Fish is a great job, but you tend to see some gruesome stuff during feeding frenzies...'

Fish Workout

"Professor, just how long did you say that evolution thing takes?"

"This party sucks! I thought there were going to be swimmers!"

'My doctor told me to eat less fish.'

"Yes we need it back. The team fired you, not Sharky."

"The sign says you can swim to civilization from here, but that sounds unlikely."

"Has anyone fed the goldfish?"

Pick A Lawyer

'I guess the drinks are watered down!'

"Oh, for God's sake, Harold, please close your mouth when you chew your food! This is a fancy restaurant."