Shark Humor Fan Gifts

'Now remember, smile and try and wiggle 'em.' - The discarded box is labelled Falsies.

Beach con-man.

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

Bite out of fishing pier.

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

The Food Chain

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

Leak in the fish tank.

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

"I don't think I can fit that into my schedule, Irv. I've got a fishing boat to attack this morning, a beach to terrorize this afternoon and a feeding frenzy this evening!"

"Heads or tails?"

Whale Shark Thoughts...

'There's something I never told you about your father, Billy. He was a lawyer.'

'They're showing 'Jaws' on TV tonight: The beaches should be quiet for a few days after that!'

'Say, are you in the mood for a Spielberg?'

A man gets a paper cut while reading in his back yard and is attacked by 'Lawn Sharks'.

"Can I interest you in a great white?"

"Dad, Dad, cage divers! Get the hacksaw and let's scare the heck out of them!"

Sand danger

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

Ice Fishing

'Relax, dude - I got your back.'

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

Shark food pyramid.

'Why can't you collect shells like the other kids?'

'And in addition it seems that he has been eating some of the other children'.

'Relax, I think it just wants the chum pizza.'

"I'll have a man overboard!"

"Are there any extra crew on board? He still looks hungry."

'You go ahead and eat. I'm on a raw food diet and surfer isn't part of it.'