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Awful Alternate Histories.

"How can you be out of wings?"

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

Batman at the Maternity Ward

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

Cariactures

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"It's not the persistent lack of sunlight or freezing temperatures that bother me - it's the crowds I can't stand."

The Fourth Little Pig

Dog chews 'The Cat Book'.

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'Okay, is there anybody else whose homework ate their dog?'

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

"Relax. I just had a vitamin."

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

"You're turn to grill tonight Adam, you make the best ribs."

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

"So, you say I'll be doubling the numbers of animals I kill?"

Super-Papi moves swiftly to defeat the evil Electronico!

'If corporate lawyers are a dime a dozen, where are the other ten?'

Welcome Spring.

'Now they're just taking the piss.'

Please Drove Carefully.

'Alright, which one of you wise guys pulled the fire alarm?'

'Super Dog'

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

"If you'd only come to me sooner I wouldn't have had to go to lunch."