Comic Hospital Worker Pillows

Disorderlies

"And I want you to meet Coco, your anesthesiologist."

"We're keeping you overnight because the nurses love you!"

"Get me this...get me that...fluff my pillow...I don't feel well...if I wanted to listen to that all day, I wouldn't have left my husband!"

Happy Birthday to you.

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

An organ flies across the room during an operation - 'Catch it...!'

"Nurse, when I asked you to make the patient more comfortable I just meant plump up his pillows!"

'Did you remove my appendix? Yes, both of them.'

"I never imagined I'd be up on my feet this soon."

'I'm afraid it's bad news Mr.Hooper, I've just got the report on your finances.'

"Grandmother, what big diastolic numbers you have."

While you're at it, will you sew on my shirt button please?

"It says you need a CT scan and that the azaleas in the corner need to be watered twice daily."

'I'm a practical nurse! -- I know better than to listen to doctors!'

"Your IQ came back negative."

'Push, dear! The child will be late for pre-school!'

Big slipper.

"His wife and family will decide on the course of treatment, but, as his ex, feel free to open up a few old wounds."

"Sorry, new style pain killer. It's the cut-backs I'm afraid."

"Would you like to see today's liquidized menu?"

"We're a bit understaffed today, could you be 6 people?"

'How the heck could we lose a $14,000 pacemaker?!'

'Perhaps I was a bit too graphic in describing the surgical procedure.'

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

Scared husband needs to have scans done in children's exam room.

'Don't be alarmed - I'm a proctologist.'

Doctor to patient: 'I won't be asking about your three marriages. This isn't an invasive procedure.'

'Get this, Dr. Melroy just asked my opinion.'

'He's got great bedside manner.'

The nurses here are so slow. Could this blanket be any thinner? The buttons on the tv remote are too darn small. Although her health had improved, Mabel's condition remained critical.

"I'm in for observation."

"The doctors say you're not doing enough to diagnose yourself."

Quick! 5-second rule!