Comic Gastronomy Fan T-Shirts

Waiter: 'Your Tossed salad Ma'am.'

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

'I brew it myself.'

'The stuff legends are made of'

Large Very Fresh Eggs

'Well, that's the last of the garlic repellent.'

Road Kill Cafe.

'Deputy, I asked 'when are you going to a restaurant?' Not 'arrest your aunt'.'

Grand rounds vs. ground rounds.

Lemon beelzebub for table 666

"Keep it in the sling and rub hot sauce on our wing every 4 hours."

'Aw, cool! Look! They got us a hot tub!'

"You know what would compliment this meal? A nice vintage milk of magnesia"

'In a four-star restaurant, one's hat does not fall into the cassoulet de castenaudary. But if ones hat does fall into the cassoulet de castelnaudary, one does not put it back on one's head.'

'Who ordered the mushy peas?

Menu From The Luxury Home of Pancakes

'A dozen bagels, please. For here.'

"That's it, deep fried or mashed. Do you want a job or not?"

"Fancy a take-a-way tonight ?"

"Hold on ... I think a table's about to open up."

"I fear this place is going downhill."

'What price range did you have in mind?'

'Thinner!'

'Hey! My Chili is Chilly!' 'I'll add some Chilies!'

'This the plan...we will make the clients think that there is a contest, and the winner will be the first one who finds a finger in the soup.'

"Keep that recipe handy. The police might want it as evidence."

'Sorry,Sir - we only have the one.'

'... And you're positive that you didn't order, fly soup?'

'Tch! We're not eating Mexican again, are we?' 'Well, I'd look pretty silly going into an Italian restaurant dressed like this.'

Funeral with Special Sauce

"I'm making dirty rice."

"According to its DNA, your meatloaf is from an unknown species."