Comedy Sketch Creator T-Shirts

'Dad, would you ming standing up, then accidentally tripping on the dog and falling flat on your face? I'll try to get it in one shot.'

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

"Shootout at the Soapy Canal"

Canned laughter for sale in Theatrical Supplies shop.

"And by president we mean the one on Saturday night tv, not the real one. He kinda sucks."

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"Larry, nooo! Don't look into the BOWL!!!"

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

'What's the big thrill about Budgie Jumping!?'

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."

"What you have is what we call Cactunitus. It's when your skin is so dry you start to morph into a cactus."

"I came here to be treated - not flattered!"

I'm going to switch you to a new medication that does more advertising.

"Welcome aboard, Thompson. Brono here will lay out the itinerary."

"Tell me Mr. Jones. Does it hurt when I do this?"

"We'll get what we need from you. Guaranteed!" "Officer Madoff, the best stool softener on the force."

Autopsy Room / a banana autopsy room.

"If 'Slothra' takes any longer climbing to the top I'll have to land and refuel again."

I believe there is something wrong with Tommy: He has perfect eyesight...

The Cartoonist's armoury

'Hope you don't mind the boxing gloves. I'm no good at hands.'

Bird flu parody of Monty Python's 'Dead parrot sketch'.

'And we're just a stone's throw from the beach.'

"Would you like me to get one our experts to tell you what you think of it."

'Take a good look at this police sketch and try to remember if you've seen anybody who can draw better.'

"I wanted to go for an explicit sex scene, but now I see this, I think I will opt for the suggestive approach!"

"Congratulations! It's a sitcom!"

'Seriously! Have you ever considered spray tan?'

"...and then we'll clear the blockage by inserting a tiny balloon."

"You're pretty fast stranger, but that's your cell phone."

"'Moors? I thought you said 'Ye Old Pour Me More Tavern'... Is that a new dress? Wait, why are there two of you? Okay, let's dance... Where's Dracula?'"