Comedy Show Devotees Pillows

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

"That'll be five bucks."

1847 - Bram Stoker, creator of Dracula was born in Dublin.

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

Theatre Crowd

Stairlift around cliff face.

God not-too-happy with the Humans sticking a 'Closing DOWN Sale!' sign on planet Earth

The First Fire Stick

"Cat World Domination Day June 24th"

"Darling... I think the Baby's been eating the fridge magnets again."

'I said you're next, Hibblemeyer. . . Hibblemeyer!'

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

Unemotional Support Animal

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

"It's true: no more burpees."

"Congratulations. It's a chick."

Two fishermen land on stumps. Man says to other, 'Is that enough structure for ya?!'

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

Divine Desk Bins

6,000 BC: Neolithic Barbecue

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

'We were thinking of naming him after his daddy, but I don't really like the name, Old slap head.'

Stormy weather

'I was told you two have a love-hate relationship. Care to elaborate on that?'

Humans Queue To Use Portable Toilet While Dogs Queue To Use Tree Portable Toilet

"The first step is admitting you're a dog."

"Very Presidential."