Comedically Inclined Executive Pillows

Perhaps an egg shaped product was the secret...but they couldn't crack it.

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"To be or not to be."

Man enters a palm reading establishment carrying a tropical plant.

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

'Not exactly what I meant by job creation.'

"If CEO pay packets aren't a problem, why doesn't everyone get one?"

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

"If she's a write off can you let me know the scrap value?"

Boy in toy car talking on phone.

'Interesting. At first, I didn't pick her as dominant.' - Child chairs meeting at Toys Inc.

"Any qualifications other than speaking the language."

"It drives me MAD when people whine about the amount top management get paid. . ."

"You're an overweight, overpaid, over-the-hill senior executive, Dalrymple. What did you have in mind to remedy that situation?"

"What fly?"

'Look, another Now Available store is opening! Maybe yo could get a job there. They seem to be opening stores all over town!'

Clown has hit wife with custard pie. Marriage guidance counsellor says: 'Does he end every argument like this?'

The only way I can get through a nudist convention.

I Have A Closed Mind.

'Oh george dear, the landlord has raised the rent!' 'Has he? I can't!'

Clown Firing Squad.

"Our founder was a real joker. That's the first silver dollar he ever glued to the floor."

"Sorry, that was the three cups of coffee, four cans of red bull, and double dose of Paxil talking."

Man at important looking desk lined with quill pens gets ready to shoot one at a dartboard on his wall.

'So, she's decided to buy the helicopter.'

'May I play through please?'

'That's the last time I ask Janice to book the stripper for the office party.'

'You're the one who called for a locksmith?'

'Dr Phil sez, if I'm gittin' the milk for free, I should do the right thing and marry her!'

It's Raining Money

"I think it's important that we look at this holistically."