Comedic Wisdom Seeker T-Shirts

"You need to put in 10,000 hours."

"In life, Arthur, less is often more. But not when it comes to money."

Bob's Marriage Advice: 'Let me give you some advice on marriage, Joe. . . try to think of me as the pope. . .'

"Do I look like the sort who knows anything about lawns?"

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

"Feel free to take notes."

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

"Who's got the hammer?"

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

Man with fishing line going into water. Fishing line coming down from sky.

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"But how do I accomplish that in 140 characters or less?"

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

"Life's a lottery - That's why you need balls"

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"Always take the bull firmly by the tail and look him directly in the eye..."

Breast Height Chart

Beyond the known and the unknown.

'You must heal yourself.'

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

"Smoke a cigar that fits your face."

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

Caveman to kid: 'There's more to life than what you read on cave walls.'