Comedic Tensions Fan T-Shirts

Boyfriend of the Month.

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

"Call me 'pops' one more time and I'll lace 'ya one!"

"She bathes him. She feeds him. She burps him. Mother's a real micromanager."

Double Saxophone

Pessimists v Optimists.

Spiro & Pusho: watering the vine and the neighbour.

Pop up begger.

"Please excuse our appearance while our records are being impounded."

Boris Johnson lies his way out of trouble

"The school construction budget is so small we can't even afford to build a snowman."

'Pay no attention to him. He's just a disgruntled former employee.'

"Do I take it that we can't be guaranteed your vote in the forthcoming election?"

'It wasn't the strength of your argument. It was your breath.'

"Excuse me - could you tell me which recession we are in at the moment?"

Husband electronic tagging control centre - Screen reads 'Pub'

'It just seem excessive, somehow -- buying a big-screen, high-definition TV to watch Geraldo with.'

"Is there anybody there?"

London Congestion & Polution Zone - 'What's your problem? I thought Boris was in charge now.'

Safety Pin

Two women are hosting a radio show called Ask Sadie.

"You in there! This is the Microsoft Police. Throw out your books and come out with your hands up."

"Hello?- Anyone here?"

"We've got kind of a noir thing happening here, Manny. The girlie cigarette doesn't exactly add."

Robot Bores

'Aside from the cockroach, how was everything?'

End of the Pier Show

"This is not the sleeping beauty I paid good money to see!"

"But we make a killing on auto repairs...if we encourage people to fix things themselves first."

"My wife thinks I'm out looking for a job..."

"My dad really went ballistic! I'm not grounded...I'm under house arrest!"

"There you go...I'll have the paramedics on standby...."