Comedic Narrative Fan T-Shirts

'Whilst you were in the toilet, they descended into the underworld.'

Thomas Keneally

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Writes A Top Ten Hit

"It's a blood curdling novel about the brutal murder of a publisher who rejected a book about the brutal murder of a publisher..."

"OMG! A portal to another panel."

"Oh, come on! I've told you, I'm not your 'imaginary friend.' I'm your father."

Gloria's life had been uneventful - until her 40th birthday, when her arms changed into swans.

"Now, see here, I've been wronged! Some no-good do-nothing rat pack got me sick, and I gotta know who!"

Knife-thrower.

'Yes, he did turn into a price, but there were complications.'

'I'm a genetically modified fish aimed at the environmentalist market.'

"Any luck"

"Well, of course you have a heart."

Roadie

"Yes, dear, we're caught in a cycle...but you can hardly call it a vicious cycle."

"Boy! That Harvey will do ANYTHING to be the center of attention, won't he?"

LARGE FRONT

Dragon roasts a chicken impaled on a knight's sword.

How come nothing good ever happens to me? Like what? Like getting taken by a foreign government then rescued. I want to get a book contract, to be part of the news cycle, to have him talk about me. Whom? Speak my name, Anderson Cooper! The great one.

News Celeb Divorce: Long-suffering wife tells us of abusive husband, In tomorrow's news - dignified husband tells us of vile grabbing wife.

'Recommended reading' selection of books e.g.'Team spirit, by Geoffrey Boycott'

Please don't tell the cows they are in a cartoon.

'That's a male-pattern bald-faced untruth.'

"Late, as usual."

I thought you wanted me to sell your car.

Mikado characters

"They called him ‘weird’, they called him ‘creepy’, but now they’d call him Sheriff."

Look at you. The vacant stare

'You give him the estimate - you're bigger than he is.'

"Hello?...I recently ordered an Indian carpet, but I think you've sent me a Sicilian one!"

Anne Enright

'Mr. Beegley will see you briefly.'

'Well you said you were hot, so should I turn the fan on or not?'

"Good news, all the tests indicate the pain and swelling are a result of wearing your pants too high."

"That night, Rachel discovered the truth about Ed’s past…" "I’ve had it with these blasted narrative boxes!"