Comedic Critic Of Austerity Measures Gifts

"Natasha cuts diagnosis costs."

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

'The great thing is, the poor won't be able to squander it on luxuries such as dignity, equality and hope!'

"Call me 'pops' one more time and I'll lace 'ya one!"

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

"She bathes him. She feeds him. She burps him. Mother's a real micromanager."

'Ick! -- I'd never vote for anybody with hair like THAT!'

I'm here to update your census form. Since you mailed the form in, have any of your children moved back in with you?

Federal Guidelines

Boris Johnson lies his way out of trouble

Pop up begger.

"The school construction budget is so small we can't even afford to build a snowman."

"Please excuse our appearance while our records are being impounded."

'Today a ray of hope . . .'

"Do I take it that we can't be guaranteed your vote in the forthcoming election?"

'Where's My Bail-out?' 'Where's Your Lobbyist?'

"Excuse me - could you tell me which recession we are in at the moment?"

London Congestion & Polution Zone - 'What's your problem? I thought Boris was in charge now.'

Fisherman Funneral

"I understand she's marrying him for his condominium in Fort Lauderdale."

'It just seem excessive, somehow -- buying a big-screen, high-definition TV to watch Geraldo with.'

"It's a simple stress test - I do your blood work, send it to the lab, and never get back to you with the results."

Safety Pin

Robot Bores

"This is not the sleeping beauty I paid good money to see!"

"Connect the dots"

"We've got kind of a noir thing happening here, Manny. The girlie cigarette doesn't exactly add."

'Aside from the cockroach, how was everything?'

"But we make a killing on auto repairs...if we encourage people to fix things themselves first."