Comedic Conflict Lover T-Shirts

'...I really wish you would of told me you wanted to be a ballerina before we got married.'

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

After the gun ban, the guys still liked to go out and horse around on weekends.

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

Loggerheads

"Sales rep from Milton Keynes? You prove he no British spymaster who sent you on secret mission to Bananastan?"

'Until you remember where you put the ladder, be quiet!'

Man and Women in a Boxing Ring

"Good news, honey - I've been fired. We're rich."

'I didn't recognize your old boyfriend at first. He's got a new car.'

Blower wars.

"Sorry, my mum asked me to babysit my brother at the last minute..."

'OK, pal, you've called me a little shrimp for the last time - let's see what you're made of!'

Police taking pizzas from crashed pizza delivery bike.

'A family car trip.' 'Contents Under Pressure.'

"I'm alright, it's my hair...I need more hairspray."

'We can learn a lot about motivation for sports psychology.'

Lone traveller is befriended by tourist from hell.

Angel kicked out of heaven, sent to Hell, on basis of 'creative differences.'

"You and I lack a basic understanding."

"Mom! My laundry is ready!"

Racing road signs

'Listen, no tantrums, we are going to my mother's!'

Two men arguing on a train journey

"I don't care if it is your job. If you issue me with that ticket, don't bother coming home tonight!"

". . . And, Reggie, if you're willing to give me one more chance, I promise never to flirt with another man again!"

Workers in Hazmat suits make sweets

"I warned you not to do Jeff Koons."

"But will they cover the spread?"

'Say you're sorry and promise to give him a rossette.

'Say, aren't you the building inspector who gave us such a hard time when we were building a house last year?'