Comedic Aviator Pillows

"I know it's a pie in the sky, Henshaw, but from a career perspective point of view we'll log it in as 'unidentified small aircraft'."

'So much for your new Satnav!'

'They're right.polorized sunglasses do help you see better underwater.'

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

'We're looking with someone with balls...not an enlarged prostate.'

"Half a dozen brown—three large, three jumbo!"

'At least the bigger prop gives us more thrust.'

Teacher to student: 'I taught your father. He owes me $3,000 for therapy.'

"This is the future of logistics. Thanks to our new technology this parcel can miss-send itself to somewhere in Kazakhstan."

'Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?'

"No, I said, 'You turn here, not, 'U-Turn here'."

"The Bible . . . that would be under self-help."

Man fights with his shadow.

'It's been so long since he's been on dry land.'

Skis with stabilisers.

'We're lost - I told ye to take the low road.'

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'

"Thar someone from the IRS blows!"

Snow seat on skis.

I was telling him a story of my granddaughter's wedding.

"I wasn't texting while driving. I was driving while texting."

'You didn't train for this marathon, did you?'

'Hike the Alps? I'm getting out of breath just keeping my foot on the accelerator!'

For Those Who Don't Feel That Driving School Is Quite Enough, There's...Driver's University

'Due to technical difficulties the scenic route is currently unavailable'

Horse bolts from Horse-box it sees in a carpark.

Golf Ball in Nest.

"I know I encourage employees to take initiative, Tom... but I think you should change that back!"

Men should not be afraid to stop and ask for directions.

"That's a lovely tee-shot." - "Well, thank you, it matches my underpants."

Ski Lift