Comeback Champion Gifts

Sunrise. Sunflop. Sunback.

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

"He's writing a novel for the first time in decades. It has less to do with the urge to create or say something new, and more to do with the fact that all his previous books are now out of print."

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

A lesson in wit

"Try a new tactic, punch back."

"Ninety days, catnip-free. I couldn't have done it without you."

"Not to quibble, Helen, but if you look up 'Pathetic Loser' in the dictionary I don't believe anyone's picture is there."

"Stimulating this area of the brain will enable the patient to think of all the clever things he wished he had said."

"Quick, Bartlett! Instill them with hope!"

"Now just hold on...I've pre-recorded some snappy comebacks since I never remember them during these meetings."

'I'm proud of the lads. They show'd a lot of character coming back from one down. . . then two or three silly goals. . . At this level you get punished. But overall I thought we were a bit unlucky. . .'

'I would go to the end of the world for you.' - 'Yes, but would you stay there?'

'Reinventing myself.'

'Your divorce was so mature, balanced, rational...you want to throw that all away with a reconciliation?'

The Voluntary Sector takes a beating

"Phil is my Vice President in Charge of Snappy Comebacks."

Not Such A Fool As He Looks.

"I've got an idea for my comeback."

'Mr. Churchill, you are drunk !' 'Yes Madam and you are ugly but tomorrow I shall be sober.'

Back on the mound after succesful Elton John surgery.

"Is there a reason you haven't done any work?"

'My homework? Why, at home.'

"He killed in rehab."

'He was our top salesman. We hope that one day, he will be again.'

The comeback trail

King vs King- who's the clown?

'We can't end the meeting now. I've got this list of snappy comebacks I thought up during lunch!'