Comeback Champ Gifts

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

"He's writing a novel for the first time in decades. It has less to do with the urge to create or say something new, and more to do with the fact that all his previous books are now out of print."

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

"Ninety days, catnip-free. I couldn't have done it without you."

"Stimulating this area of the brain will enable the patient to think of all the clever things he wished he had said."

"Try a new tactic, punch back."

"Quick, Bartlett! Instill them with hope!"

'I would go to the end of the world for you.' - 'Yes, but would you stay there?'

'Reinventing myself.'

"Now just hold on...I've pre-recorded some snappy comebacks since I never remember them during these meetings."

'I'm proud of the lads. They show'd a lot of character coming back from one down. . . then two or three silly goals. . . At this level you get punished. But overall I thought we were a bit unlucky. . .'

"I didn't think this shift was ever going to end, YOU are in for a long day my friend, and water-bottle is going to have to come in early."

The Voluntary Sector takes a beating

"Phil is my Vice President in Charge of Snappy Comebacks."

'True but only in practice, not in principle.'

Not Such A Fool As He Looks.

"I've got an idea for my comeback."

"Is there a reason you haven't done any work?"

"He killed in rehab."

Back on the mound after succesful Elton John surgery.

'My homework? Why, at home.'

'He was our top salesman. We hope that one day, he will be again.'

"If you're a self made man...why did you made yourself so short?"

"Kid, you got a 'While You Were Out' message."

The comeback trail

"Yep, I was the little runt you used to tease all the time! Guess what, I had a late growth spurt..."

"I've always feared this day would come. I'm running out of snarky replies."