Combat Sports Lover Gifts

"..and in the blue corner....biter of ears, raper of women."

'It's good to see you sweating off your stress.'

'Such petulance!'

UFC on steroids...

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

Mixed Doubles.

'The bad news is you're going to marry a geek, and not a pro athlete. The good news is the geek owns the team.'

Mini tennis players playing on table tennis court.

Baseball pitch with a sign saying 'No Left Turn.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

The University Cricket Match - a sketch at Lord's.

Dialogue about the relationship.

'Oi, nobody gives me a kiss.'

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

Egyptian Football

"So, what are you reading?"

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

"Think of me as the designated sitter."

"This round, forget the finesse. Hit him."

COWS: Cow Pong

Golf with a difference

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

The Epsom Derby - Bookies

I love Basketball.

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

'You bought an F-14 equipped with an internal 20 mm vulcan gatling-type paintball gun? I think you might be taking this paintball thing a little too seriously!'

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

What is it with football and this drinking culture?

"Okay...let's concentrate on discussing strategy during halftime."

"I can't imagine how things could get any worse."

A man with a shirt reading 'No Pain No Gain' runs past a man who is relaxing with a 'No Pain No Pain' shirt on.