Color-coordinated Reader Gifts

'I need three books with burnt orange covers, one with chocolate brown and one with light beige - but no best sellers. I don't want people to think I'm trendy.'

Audio Books

"I'm busy this afternoon, but I can crayon you in for Saturday."

A woman with a novel and poetry handbag.

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

What every man thinks to himself when he puts on a pink shirt.

'How many blummin' shades of black ARE there?'

"I'm enhancing my appreciation for the knowledge gathered by humankind."

Cat going to litter box with newspaper to read.

'Men will never understand.'

'Daddy, why is that man wearing a blank T-shirt?'

"Painted like this, finding furniture to match at least one colour should be simple!"

Bib's E-Book Readers.

Woman shops while man sets up noose. "Do I go with bright white, deep white...."

'I'm looking for a business suit, in a color that will let me blend in.'

Decorating a column.

'Can you read the story with more enthusiasm? You're putting me to sleep.'

'Does this book come with director commentary.'

Nail shop offers cell phone covers that match painted nails.

"Thank you for not saying 'Missed a bit.'"

"I'm sorry, but Woolfsey Academy expects a basic level of preparation from its candidates. Mistaking vermilion for scarlet? I don't think so.".

Juggler

Painters

Down with leather bookbinding. Read paperbacks.

'....Who's the interior decorator again?'

Blonde woman talking to airport bookshop assistant, 'I'll be spending a lot of time by the pool - do you have anything in pink that would match my bikini?'

"You look great, dear. Your skin goes with anything."

'You stop buying books and I'll stop buying plants.'

A man walks into a modern art museum, where a painting matches his shirt.