Collider Fan Gifts

Higgs Boson particles at a training session: "Geneva is a no-fly zone."

Trump Administration Raising White Flag in Ukraine

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

A Guide to Balloon Animals

"And I want you to meet Coco, your anesthesiologist."

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

Dead Funny

'It's an extinction notice.'

Clown waits for 'Happy Hour' to begin.

'You know what they say...live fast, die young and leave a great fossil.'

Henry the amazing talking dog.

"Don't move! It's as I suspected, they're attracted to clowns!"

"We hope seeing a marriage counselor maybe could make one of us less stubborn!"

"I don't know whether to be mad that you had water this whole time or impressed with your commitment to the joke."

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

"It says here on your resume that one of your qualities is a sense of humor. Care to elaborate?"

Juggler and Illusionist

"Squirting flower, squirting flower...."

'Would you like a balloon with that?'

"I get the strange feeling this has happened before."

Clown walks balloon dog

"...you mean this is the end of the 3 bandidoes?"

Then, after 3.7 million years...something funny happened.

'Another balloon animal? And who do you think ends up taking care of these?'

Custard pie ejects from book - 'How to be a clown'

Upon graduation, all of the clowns would gather to find out where their assignments would be.

'OK Johnson, coffee break is over.'

'Are we us or them?'

Office Policy: Never Have More Than One Clown On A Team.

'That's far enough for the first trip -- gather some soil samples and initiate re-entry procedures.'

'Never forget, Sweetheart, it's my low comedy that keeps you in high fashion!'

"Whaddya mean Happy Hour is over?!"

'Hi, I'm looking for something small and portable!'

"My guess is you've been telling too many sick jokes."