College Football Coach Pillows

'The sad part is, the kid still doesn't get why his stock has plummeted...'

Tommy Tuberville

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

I like the Jets...I guess

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

Reach for the Star.

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

'Another football scholarship offer?'

Time Is Money

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

Go! Means NOW!

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

The trauma of losing.

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

Football

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

Bringing Your Child To The Bicycle Race