College Enrollment Pillows

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

Stoics vs. Epicureans.

Why College Costs So Much 101.

Computer Science Class 10101010101.

Procrastinator Foumdation: 'We're putting off the decision to fund you for at least another month...'

'Retire? What if I want to go to college if I, you know, finish high school?'

'I really wanted to only take accounting courses, but my parents made me take this cartooning class so I would have something to fall back on.'

Frat House Feng Shui

"I attempted Greek Math and stuck out like a Thor sum."

"Ain't it great to be back on campus again?"

"Enrol now, meditation course."

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

'Let's enrol on the last one. We've more chance of getting a job doing that these days.'

'...and, if I don't get a place, I'll kill myself.'

'I lost my name tag at my self-discovery class!'

College class: the Clinton years must be 18 to enroll.

Student Loan Interest Rates.

"Mom, my student loans are so high, I was wondering if I could start doing chores again for an allowance."

Please School Remotely.

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

Continuing education.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

"College basketball recruiters are after him."

"One year closer to college!"

"My homework ate my dog."

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."