College Celebration T-Shirts

Big Fish Little Fish Cardboard Box.

'Hmph. College kids.'

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

'I guess there are lots of rotten jobs, Gramma...I hope I don't have to clean the taco hut forever.'

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

Evolution Exam Results.

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

'You must have been wearing your beer googles.'

"Political Science... that's in the Department of Performing Arts."

Pesky students.

'And, for the student with the most hits on his or her Facebook page, the award goes to Lisa Skemley!'

What've you been up to since college, Lemont? Oh, I became a journalist … had a kid, blah blah … but I wanna hear about you, Rudy. Grigori Rasputin. How've you been all these years? How's your Uncle Mort? Are you a Russian spy? Boop boop boop. How'd that stomach-tumble-translator startup you founded in the nineties go? Wait ... what did you say you became? What do they have on President Trump? How's your cat? Boop.

Man, Lemont … how long's it been? Twenty years? Just about. You still working at Pigville Pork Burgers? Nah … I got a job as the Candorville Chronicles White House correspondent. Then I went on to found Candorville.com, the internet's seventh largest source for news and opinion. Oh. That's cool. That's cool. How do you not know this? We're Facebook friends. I post links to my articles every day. We were roommates all through college, and you don't even read my updates? Facebook's for reading yo

Cambridge dons eat a banquet outside to prove they only get one chicken each.

'I'm on the short degree course... hell of a lot to pack into one year!'

Day one, post grad

Yahoo! What's that about? She got into the college of her choice. Which college is it? Not sure. She chose to apply to 37. West Fester High School.

'As you know, some of us can't keep up with the pace of new technology.'

"I got my PhD in Nursing just so people would have to call me Doctor."

'He's never going to graduate. How about giving him an honorary degree instead?'

DACA

Bro of Frankenstein

College game crowd: 'WE WON',,,'and that somehow makes you superior'

"In obedience school, I was voted 'Most likely to chew a slipper'."

"Oh, just great, Dick. How are things going with you?"

"Does he have to do that every time he gets a little grant?"

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

'That's all there is in my college fund? That won't even buy the beer!'

'F.G.G. First Grade Graduate.'

Instead of a cap and gown Mike got a hairnet and spatula.

Monkey Business College

"I love college."

'I missed my roommate so I went out and got this spray called, 'Never Showers,' and now it's like she never left.'