College-bound Overachiever Pillows

"Hey, there's Sara, padding her college-entrance résumé!"

Overjumpers

"Doing your homework may lead to a job that has homework."

"One year closer to college!"

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

Genius Envy

'I told you hard work would pay off in the third grade, Cate...You've had three job offers.'

Overloaded with extracurricular activities, Griffin's body began to grow an extra brain to cope with it all.

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

'They're a very successful family.'

"You'll never make it as a doctor with handwriting like this. I understood every word."

Too big to fail

"Rosalie—your poor performance this year has reduced your parents' investment in you by almost seventy per cent."

Workaholics Anonymous meeting: 'No one showed up. Everyone is working.'

"Congratulations Professor, the committee 'okayed' your grant request."

"Stop applying! You've been accepted to three universities!"

'No ulcers shows me you haven't reached your full potential.'

'Good news Mom. I was accepted to the college of your choice.'

'That's your report card and might I add you need to try a little harder.'

I got into the college everyone wants to go to! Well played. It's the perfect fit for me! Way to go! Eco-Club. Which one is it? Dunno. Why do you care? So I don't apply there!

I'm interning at town hall for my college transcript. Cool. I'm taking AP classes to boost my GPA. How about you, Twig? I'm working at my dad's nursery. What do you get out of that? Money. Novel idea!

"Looks like a storm ahead, Captain." "I think you're being over dramatic."

'But Marvin, you can't be a college graduate for a living!'

The bane of every college applicant: the admissions essay.

Ladder of success"...Perhaps, you'd like our economy model."

"This'll look great on my transcript!"

'As much time and effort as he puts into this job, you'd think there was some money in it.'

Still a Disappointment to his Mother

"This has been a productive homework session!"

"You promised to stop bringing your work home."

'...then I got my masters in psychology, and a year later I earned my Ph.D. in sociology. By the time I get my master in math and my doctorate in history, I'll be ready to retire.'

"You see 'The Man' devised this shrewd plan so more people can go to college and become doctors and lawyers and stuff. Now that they're 'productive members of society,' revolution is the last thing on their minds! I plan to make that my doctoral thesis wh

The sixth college sense. 'I see debt people.'

"My dad doesn't nag me enough about going to college."

Test preps, PSATs, SATs, AP courses, community service, 3 sports, 2 clubs and chorus