College Acceptance Day Gifts

The sixth college sense. 'I see debt people.'

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Another football scholarship offer?'

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

'The bad news is you failed all your courses. The good news is you passed the urine test.'

'It's my application to Harvard...'

"No, I'm not the first in my family to attend college. But I am the first at an Ivy."

"Class, this is Mr. Elzondo. He's going to talk about going to college."

It's a letter from Tim. He claims his grades are improving and he might even make the DEEN's list.

'Does it matter what answer I put down? After all, this is Liberal Arts.'

Treadway college - A little knowledge, a lot of tuition.

'Cat Lit. You?'

"Stop applying! You've been accepted to three universities!"

Pinara fund

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

College game crowd: 'WE WON',,,'and that somehow makes you superior'

'I'm partially passing my Meteorology course.'

Scenes we'd most like to see...

"Well, my IQ is 180--and that's in Centigrade, not Fahrenheit."

Cover Design for Cambridge ABC (Student Magazine)