Collecting Remotes Pillows

'Seem the remote?'

'It's the TV remote - he has a death grip on it.'

"Leave me if you must, but don't take the TV remote control!"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"It's official"..."It's a drought!"

Larry's used art

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Skipping Horse

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

Grace For Flies

James Bond in a Snow Globe

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

International Women's Day

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

Packaging Russian Dolls

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

Director/Action Man toy.

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

Cat woman shopping for cats.

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

Cocktails on the verandah.

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

Seagiraffes

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

Faster, Georges, faster!