Collecting Lighters Pillows

Klepto-pyromaniac - 'Hey...Somebody just stole my lighter!'

'Of course these lighters doesn't work. They're especially made for non-smokers!'

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

Meanwhile, in Florida: Little Free Library/Little Free Firearms

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

'We will not be disarmed by gun control! We will not be stripped naked and left at the mercy of a tyrannical government!'

'Frank, when was the last time you cleaned your gun?'

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

A Rifle Competition in the North

"But seriously do you think my eclectic knowledge of the history of the development of the claw hammer makes me more of a sex magnet?"

"Now now, what have I told you about using your zombie knife at the dinner table..."

"Hon, where's the butter?"

"Well, that's right. It is a disco ball. The regular lamp is in the shop."

'Shh, Ben's running it right to us. That's his 'I've got everything under control' howl.'

'Another invention? -- You are SUCH a geek!'

A Fork-lift.

Replacement Lighthouse

A lighthouse with a welcome mat

"Get me my gun. I want to squeeze off a few last rounds."

Swiss excalibur...

The colonel's daughter, with a gun

"I like to see a man who's prepared, Remson!"

A Utility Knife.

The Spoonish Inquisition

"For extra protection, this one is armed with a tiny gun of its own."

Axes 'R' Us Store