Collecting Inventions Mugs

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

Fly Football

Clown on bike.

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

hard-boiled egg...

"Can you believe you left your job and family to search for this key, and it was under here the whole time?"

"I got a swiss army hook!"

Bathroom Fairy

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

Apocalypse Research Center

Frankenstein's Monster's PC.

'I've found a spade I like Julia...'

'Have you any W fronts?'

A close shave on the Titanic...

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

"Good heavens, Caruthers. It's the wife!"

"Cap'n FancyPants got himself an i-Patch."

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

'Remember, before entering, make sure you wipe your feet on the hazmat.'

"Thank you for holding. . .Your call is important to us. . .Yeah right."

"It called a smart phone. Cool, but no service."

Tin Can Operation.

"My goodness, no! Grandfather would never, ever let us near this!!"

Old and new technologies

Geeks and their dogs.

"Goodnight Tommy, sleeptight, watch the millenium bugs don't bite."

Melvin likes to indulge his inner child.

Nobody's Perfact (spelled wrong)

'I'll take ten, please.'

"It turns out our health plan does cover eyeglasses."

'It even tells time in metric minutes.'

"I got it in a novelty shop. But it has decreased loitering around the watercooler with 29%!"

Joke Shop product - Not Funny After 10 Sept 87

"Did you hear? It turns out old power cords are really valuable! Good things Dad kept them!"

'Celeb Foods: Damien Hurst's voles in brine.'