Collecting Colognes T-Shirts

"Nora thinks you're spoiled."

New Blah Cologne for Dull Men.

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

"I've invested in property..."

'He'll love this cologne. It has the scent of an undervalued stock.'

"I must say Jeff, there's something about your personal brand that I find refreshing."

'A nutcracker? Admit it, Fred, you're getting old.'

"What you have is what we call Cactunitus. It's when your skin is so dry you start to morph into a cactus."

'Is your cap on tight? We don't want any more accidents in the bed, do we?'

'You know...that ain't a good sign.'

Visitation Day at the Bug Jar

"They never told us what carrying twenty times our own weight would do to our knees."

'I tell you what: Thank goodness for tomato sauce...'

Exotic Insects Arrive in England with Imported Fruit

'Alex we talked about this, you can't bring live things home from the lake. . . no buts, they don't want to leave the lake. Let your little friends go.'

A bee

Florist delivers Cactus to Man on Bed of Nails

"He doesn't look like you at all."'

Flytrap nerd.

'I don't smell any drugs, just Old Spice, geezer aftershave.'

'A wine list? How prosaic. This is our list of lists: beer, wine, single malt scotch, water, soda, cognac...'

'Get the ball, Leonard! The winning run is rounding second base! You've only got a matter of hours before he scores!'

Your husband will love this cologne. It has that new car smell.

'Oh Darling, I just love the smell of your new aftershave...'

"Too much aftershave, visit to a bee farm. Bad combination."

'Your attention everybody! -- There's a 'severe foot watch' in effect until four o'clock this afternoon.'

'Say it with flowers' van driver sticks a cactus up to an aggressive driver.

Signs that colas are making you fat. . .

'Lot to be said 'bout riding off into the sunset!'

"He's not in. Can you crawl back after lunch?"

"I've always admired you. I find your complete lack of compassion refreshing."

"The idea is to start a little satellite program of our own...."

"I told them I wanted a power environment. They answered with just one word."

"I'm wearing new cologne. I hope Smiley is able to control herself around me today."

"Serious drinkers recommend hanging on to the maraschino."