Colleague's Birthday Gifts

"Now just why do you think I would know how to fix the printer?"

'I have much less stress since I replaced my in box with a paper shredder.'

'It's a suitability test I give all flexible working requests.'

"I'm very pleased with the way you've handled this thankless boring job, Fenwick...."

Penguin at work with zebra and lion says: 'The commute is killing me.'

'I didn't tell you to 'be quite Frank'. I said,'be quiet, Frank'!'

Security Dept. Keep. Out.

'How's it going with me? Oh, you know, still dealing with the same old shit.'

"They'e redesigned our cubicles."

'...but I'm already working as slow as I can.'

Laugh break

'I hate the job I'm lucky to have.

'I wonder where that's going' (man carring arrow with 'blame' written on it).

"He seized the day again. Now how do we get it back?"

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

James Bond in a Snow Globe

'Look, you can only do so much!'

International Women's Day

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf

'The lads at the office still talk about the day you told the boss what to do with his job...'

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

Colour Version: Living by the Clock