Coffee Afficionado Gifts

". . . This artificial intelligence is going to far. . ."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

Burning the midnight oil.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"Give me all the caffeine you have."

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

Back to work...

"I remember when we first met you were an exhausted young doctor! Now you're an exhausted middle-aged doctor!"

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

Joined at the hipster.

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

Office Supplies/Coffee Supplies.

Balancing two espresso martinis

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

Allegro con molto espresso

"Two vegans, please."

Drink for me and my hot mamma. Now! We don't serve beer. Latte. Two, punk! Decaf. You don't want to see him angry. Also, low-foam and soy milk would be great. You don't want to see him gassy. Can I get one of those little Twizzler sticks to stir it with? Cube of brown sugar, please. And one nonfat blueberry scone! Two! I'd like to see how John Wayne would've ordered a fancy coffee drink.

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

"I'm losing my patience with you."

"5 chocolate brownies, 3 banana muffins, 4 caramel cookies and one cappuccino - skinny."

"The more coffee I drink, the more these motivational posters make sense."

You've Had Enough!

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

Non-Power Breakfast

"We used up our planet's energy source and we're here to hijack yours. Where do you keep all your coffee?"