Code Cruncher Gifts

"No, this is 111110100111101111 ... you want 111110100111101101."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

The Computer Bore

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

The DaVinci Code

Barks in code.

Entering the Business Community: Assets/Liabilities

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

'If you're so smart, why don't you have some Index Funds in your portfolio?'

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

Gerry, there are more accurate ways of balancing the petty cash.

Pi Ala Mode.

Computer Science Class 10101010101.

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

Sales chart is buildings in background.

"Thank you for that summation of the charts."

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'