Code Cracker Gifts

"This is Pete, our cryptocurrency expert."

'...Send again doesn't look like they got it.'

"Don't feel bad. Even I don't understand me."

Web cams. Web scams

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'Data, data everywhere!'

'I've cracked it! It's all in German!'

'Sometimes I just feel like processing some data, but I have no data to process - other times I have the data, but I have nothing to process it with.'

"What did you think of the encryption article?"

"He says he''s working on some patches, exploits and vulnerabilities, but I know hacking when I see it."

'Captain, I think we're entering the Binary System!'

"Big data, firewalls and would-be hackers, they're nothing new . . ."

'I've got one week to master this program. The boss is threatening to hire an eight year old.'

'By putting all our data into code, our competitors can't read it, our unathorized personnel can't read it, and I'm afraid, neither can we.'

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

Entrance code to MENSA club - 'To enter, simply type in the square root of Pi.'

'Rather than learning how to solve that, shouldn't I be learning how to operate software that can solve that?'

If at first you don't succeed call it version 1.0

Cryptologists Anonymous

'Website still under construction'

Computer Science Class 10101010101.

STRIP Hambone: Talking Fortran

"He's fluent in 24 computer languages and never says a bloody word to me."

"Bugger! I was just about to crack his code, when he burnt his blanket."

"...Software upgrade provides a seamless transition from simple functionality to multi-platform confusion, chaos and frustration..."

'But, what if we break the genetic code and they just CHANGE it?'

"I know your work is highly classified, but couldn't you at least unencrypt yourself before you come home?"

"The algorithm isn't showing us as many stars as it used to."

Jim unwittingly wanders into a rough section of the Computer Science department.

"This program really isn't user friendly."

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

"I think we're going to have to look at our recruitment algorithms again."

"I don't get this. I know that you're a computer hacker and must have done many bad things. But your record is completely clean!"

"That didn't work either! I'm telling you, this is one AGGRESSIVE virus!"

Computer Crimes