Cocktail Party Critic Gifts

"I don't have a lot of edge-I just hate you."

"I hate these cocktail parties. . !"

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

Cocktails on the verandah.

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

"Well there's no way I'm going to say 'whom'!"

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

"And what do you do to maintain your cardiovascular fitness, Miss Holt?"

"I like his earlier work better, particularly the ones I said I didn't like at the time."

"Well, after ad school, our Timothy made a 6-second Ad that nobody saw."

Sparks Fly When The Little Gray Suit Meets The Little Black Dress

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

"Oh, great, there are the Cardwells. Bet you they try to talk to us about their levitating cube."

"And this is Helen, my wife by a previous marriage."

"The wifi password? Of course Madame, it's 'Ilove100boobies69'."

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"Excuse me, Jerrod, but I'm leaving you for Paul's competing narrative."

"How is the dollar trading against the Martini today, Jack?"

A man at a cocktail party wears a nametag that reads "Trouble".

'..and if you must yawn tonight keep your mouth shut.'

"What do I do - I'm a mouse pilot, like everybody else."

"My feeling is that while we should have the deepest respect for reality, we should not let it control our lives."

"Wow! The big guy! And what kind of B.T.U.s am I looking at here?"

"I devote most of my time to defending the bastions of culture."

"How much longer, roughly, will you be introducing me as a 'disgruntled Republican'?"

"Please forgive us for being so late- we had parking issues."

'If you start granting amnesty for people for following their conscience, pretty soon everyone will be following his conscience.'

"I was surprised myself, but living apart, seeing other people, and having virtually nothing to do with each other actually has made our marriage stronger."

"Aperitif?"

'The first cocktail.'

"It keeps me from looking at my phone every two seconds."

"I always wondered who got my transplant."