Coaching Critic Gifts

'This is an amicable split. Coach O'Neill has done a great job. We just have different ideas...'

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

I like the Jets...I guess

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

Reach for the Star.

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

"I AM at my usual position."

Time Is Money

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

Go! Means NOW!

The trauma of losing.

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

Back to school.

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

A married couple share the same pole vault.

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

A Hard Look At Hard Looks