Clumsy Appreciation Society Pillows

'Quick! ontact my doctor!'

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

"Yes, it's a sports related injury. He dropped his bowling ball."

"I dropped my goblet!"

"Put it on my tab."

Man walks into 'Watch your step' sign.

'Shh, let me do the talking.'

'Well, it WAS worth nine thousand dollars. Sorry about that.'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

"I'm here because I keep bumping into old friends. Like, literally bumping into them."

'Can I help it if I was given all thumbs and two left feet?'

"Nice going, Einstein."

Man reading letter, 'You may already be a winner' about to step on rake.

"Oh my God Ruth, it's that bull again!"

'Do you still wonder why you were passed over for accounting research manager?'

Cat in bandages and on a crutch.

'Don't you think it's about time you learned to walk through walls?'

'You know, this is the second bottle of this I've opened, and I still have no idea what it tastes like.'

"Would you please leave the painter alone!!!"

'Little help here?'

Man carrying lots of brushes is about to trip over one.

'Darn it, Marvin! Can't you do anything right?'

'To be honest, I'm surprised you employed me!'

Attila the Klutz.

'Be reasonable, Daphne - It's the only thing I've broken during the whole course of our marriage!'

Stick Man/Schtick Man

"Maybe it would be best if you waited out here."

Man hitting himself in the head with a hammer.

"Man...it's totally hard to look cool without a car."

Perfect sincerity; or, tinkings aloud No. I - Bachelor who dislikes children tells a mother that he will not leave her son anything just because he is named after him

Bull in a China Shop: You break it, you buy it,

"And the winner for the fastest time for dropping and breaking a new phone is Timmy, at 1 hour and 23 minutes."

"Hey - guess who I ran into today..?"

'Ouch!'