Club Chuckers T-Shirts

'Rover isn't any good at catching frisbees. You've heard of stone hands?...he's got a stone mouth.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

Hypnotoon

"Hey. We’re in the doghouse every night. That’s the beauty of it."

"Guess we are going to the coffee shop!"

'Perhaps he's heard we're losing our churchwarden.'

'Next time the pastor asks if you know what his sermon was about, the answer is not about three hours.'

Sermon - why our religion is really better than yours.

'Golly, is it that time already?'

"Uh-oh. The so-called marriage penalty."

"I hear he has a reputation as a loose Canon."

"The charge is loitering, your honor."

'If the Lord had wanted us to use the metric system, there would have been ten apostles!'

'Look, Brother Timothy - a sign from God!'

"But if you teach him to fish, you have fed him for a lifetime."

"...lettuce pray."

"We learned in Sunday School about how Cain whacked Abel."

Polly Clinic.

"Turn to page 12 for our non-binary singalong."

Keyboard in Heaven

"It's weeder's elbow."

'Today's sermon is on the Gospel according to old Saint Matt....'

"That was a good sermon...but I'd have settled for a soundbite."

The sermon was so boring the Preacher put himself to sleep.

'You want a second opinion? -- Oh, a big shot, eh?'

Circus doctor.

"Seats in all parts!"

'No kidding? You don't wear anything underneath either?'

Missing Parsons.

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