Cloud Nine Conversationalist Gifts

'Isn't it heaven to always be right...'

"I thought there would be bacon here."

'Stocks plummeted on news of your demise.'

Damn defibrillators.

"This is neither Heaven nor Hell. It's the private sector."

"The last thing I remember was asking my broker if all my money had been in risk-free bonds."

"Your PA isn't due up here for another 27 years. You'll just have to answer the questions yourself."

'I think I'm going to like it here!'

Heavenly Take Out

"It's very nice. I just think they could add a spa."

"Speaking only for myself, the unexamined life was a total gas!"

The Cheese God

Heaven on the Phone to Hell - 'We've got Sky.'

An Angel getting his dog to jump through his Halo using it like a Hoop

"Once a sinner, always a sinner!"

'Well, what do you think of the new BOOYA halo?'

"Sorry. I'm molting."

'Wait ... Nobody brought a ball? Now what are we going to do for all eternity?'

Actually, I was looking for a tax haven.

'I didn't expect Paradise to be so literal...'

"Assigned to cloud nine! I haven't been there since I caught that twelve pound bass!"

'Call me 'Pete'. We're very informal here.'

God/Saint Watching Football.

Angles on cloud 9 always get to live it up.

'If this were really heaven there would be fire hydrants.'

Heavy angels play ring-toss using halos and thin angel.

I know, I was expecting something different too...

Life after death. It's all about altitude. "Whaz up?" "Aside from you pants - everything."

'I managed to take it with me but it seems to be useless here."

'I save these for casual Fridays.'

Well, that routine physical didn

Whaddaya mean "oops"?

'Whoever would have thought you couldn't get in without a jacket and tie?'

"There, would you believe it - Made in China!"

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'