Cloud Nine Chuckle Gifts

"I thought there would be bacon here."

R.I.P. ZZ Top - Dusty Hill 1949-2021

'Stocks plummeted on news of your demise.'

Damn defibrillators.

"This is neither Heaven nor Hell. It's the private sector."

"Your PA isn't due up here for another 27 years. You'll just have to answer the questions yourself."

'I think I'm going to like it here!'

Heavenly Take Out

"It's very nice. I just think they could add a spa."

Heaven on the Phone to Hell - 'We've got Sky.'

'Well, what do you think of the new BOOYA halo?'

"Sorry. I'm molting."

Actually, I was looking for a tax haven.

Angles on cloud 9 always get to live it up.

Heavy angels play ring-toss using halos and thin angel.

I know, I was expecting something different too...

'I didn't expect Paradise to be so literal...'

'Call me 'Pete'. We're very informal here.'

"Assigned to cloud nine! I haven't been there since I caught that twelve pound bass!"

'If this were really heaven there would be fire hydrants.'

'I save these for casual Fridays.'

Well, that routine physical didn

Life after death. It's all about altitude. "Whaz up?" "Aside from you pants - everything."

"Who knew we could take our Frequent Flyer miles with us?"

'I managed to take it with me but it seems to be useless here."

'Isn't it heaven to always be right...'

'Sorry, but we've never gotten enough golfers here to make it worthwhile to put in a golf course.'

'Whoever would have thought you couldn't get in without a jacket and tie?'

Whaddaya mean "oops"?

"There, would you believe it - Made in China!"

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

Golf Heaven: Is it like I'd imagined? Yeah, pretty much.

"With no snooker tables, it's not my idea of heaven."

Site Acquired For 200,000 Homes

"Ever since I died, I don't care as much about the crossword."