Climbing Court Enthusiast Pillows

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

I love Lawyers

"That arrow always goes to the bottom when I walk by."

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"Look , Malcolm, I get it that you're ambitious. But can't you put that damn thing down just for a minute?"

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

The Birth of a Lawsuit

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

Rubbish and Everest

Childhood

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

'Every day, I'm suing better and better...'

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."

Criminal Stupidness

Judge

"Not guilty, Your Honor, on the basis of a previously undiagnosed and untreated case of Integrity Deficit Disorder!"

'Great. Another trainee lawyer.'

"Hang on—I dropped my car keys."

"It's called being preemptive."

Remember when?... When was that?

AMERICAN CIVIL LIBERTIES UNION ACLU, HELP TAKE A BITE OUT OF LAW, 'I like it!'

'Sorry, but I do not recall that incident either.'

'Knock it off, Gus! This is tough enough without your yodeling!'