Click-happy Trader Gifts

"Basically it makes the same mistakes we've always made - but it makes tham so much faster!"

The day the stock market went UP.

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

Likes: $2.

It's okay Mom! As a broker, I'm under supervision of the SEC!

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

City Boy.

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

Day trading.

Warning that Inflationary Policies Could Lead to Crash on Wall St

'When investment bankers give parental advice'

'Tech stocks dropped on the finding that technology isn't neccessarily the best solution to everything.'

'Call the boss! We're in trouble!'

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

A child runs an equity stand.

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

'This is where I hang out until bullishness makes a comeback.'

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

Why markets crash.

'So, gentlemen, how's the dollar trading against the immortal soul, today?'

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

Our Motto: Buy Low Sell High is the Best Revenge.'

'City Traders - The Complete Menagerie'

'How to time the market' seminar - 2pm, postponed to 3pm, then to 4pm.

"They've made these fund prospectuses much easier to read." Brochure states; 'Give us all your money and get lost."

Hedge fund sharks attacking 'The Markets' ship.

Dow Jones drop

Jumping Wall Street.

'Better brace yourself. It looks as though your broker's now equipping your monthly statement with crumple zones.'

"I was downgraded to junk status at work today."

Vanna White: The Later Years.

'Stocks rose on the rumor that the market is mostly rumor-driven.'

Aggressive growth fund loses money shorting gold.