Cliché Comic Gifts

"I just heard some interesting news. The world is going to the dogs."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"The cat told me to eat your homework."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

Countervailing Clichés.

"Repeat after me: We are delivering the proactive core value promises and rolling out our real time best practice action plan going forward ..."

The Devil's in the detail!

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

'Here's the good news. 'Happy camper' and 'are we having fun yet' have been added to the official list of banned cliches.'

"No, I don't believe youth is wasted on the young. I believe money is."

'It's negative attention ... as long as you keep asking why, they'll keep on doing it.'

Mystery Writing 101 - Mailbox: The butler did it, the gardener, the chauffeur.

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

"Hello darling, what do you do for a living?"

"If all you have is a whatchamacallit then every problem looks like a thingamajig."

"Milton Woolburg, founder of traditions, legends, and general flimlam."

'This doesn't work as a heart-felt plea for world peace, but with some astute editing, it might be great on a greeting card.'

Leopards do change their spots

"Thanks for your introductory speech at the conference. By the way, Hibblemeyer, it's 'hard-headed' businessman, not 'thick-headed'."

'Lookout, here comes another boatload of cartoonists.'

'I'd like to push the envelope, go the extra mile, and think outside the box to facilitate a win-win solution to the over-utilization of buzzwords.'

'Too many cliches? Now hold your horses!'

The hero dramatically rides off into the sunset.

'Reserved' (presumably for little miss muffet)

"There are far too many balls in your court, Brintner!"

"There is such a thing as a free lunch-it just tastes bad."

"Take us to your feeder."

Clancy: Hard Work Never Killed Anybody

'I need an officer to respond to a report of a stolen donut truck.'

"Herewith, we recommend the following: when you're up to your rear in alligators, it's worth remembering your original purpose was to drain the swamp...."

"Always a bridesmaid..."

Pushing the envelope.

'Hmmm, the 27th you say... Yes, I'm away that day, so I guess it's OK for you to play...'

A panhandler with a sign that reads "I'll never work in this town again!".

Jeffrey N.: The Guy who managed to get the lead out of his pants, but they were still the wrong pants.