Claw Connoisseurs T-Shirts

"Oh, yeah! A little to the right. . . down a bit. . . Ahhh!"

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Theatre Crowd

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

'We found you in a cabbage!'

"Before I fight this dragon and rescue you, can I ask a few questions? Like, do you want kids? What's your passion? Where is 'home' to you? Do you have a financial philosophy?"

Bee to bee: 'We used buzzwords before they were trendy.'

Monster Clown

"Your therapy will be a combination of drugs and clowns."

'Thank goodness next week we'll be in a new dynasty and we can make some other style of pottery.'

Magic coat fixing problems while walking the dog.

"I can't be sure...I only got a quick look."

"C'mon! C'mon! Almost there..."

"You're amazing!"

"They never told us what carrying twenty times our own weight would do to our knees."

"You need a mint."

'Same problem every morning. What to wear..?'

'Snob, he won't eat domestic slugs, just imports.'

4-Panel: (1) 'Did you read this article on cockroaches?' (2) 'It says scientists have confirmed conditioned reflexes in cockroaches, just like Pavlov's dogs. I don't know if I believe that!' (4) 'What's for dinner?'

'Thank you for noticing, Shirley - but beauty comes at a price, It hampers my hunting, limits my berry picking and typing's a real pain,'

'OK, who ordered the prawn cocktail?'

"I only live for 24 hours, so I need a temp job that pays big bugs."

'… and another thing … the only reason you know it's my birthday to begin with, is because we were all born on the same day!'

'Dude! Did you even check if that cloak had a flame retardant, before you bought it?'

'I'm sorry, but we're letting all of you go. Your jobs have been outsourced to India.'

'Mmmm. How do you get the custard so creamy? You must give me the recipie!'

'And, as you can see, it is the perfect place to start a big family...'

'Your hanging baskets are looking good this year, Sir Ranolf.'

"Now you're thinking outside the box!"

"I'm tired of being the cockroach you want me to be and not the cockroach I want to be."

'My trick for avoiding extra work is to look busy all the time...'