Classical Scholar T-Shirts

Dog in ancient dog house

A.E. Housman

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

'If you were disturbed by any issues raised, please call your mum.'

Venus

Archimedes statue with a lever

'Where was the TSA?'

"There's only one 'L' in colosseum."

Playdough's The Republic

Archimedes helps Sisyphus

Schrodinger's Black Box

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

Eagle (The Divine Comedy).

A surprise in heaven

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

"I miss the Augean stables."

'Et tu Yakamoto?'

'Why can't we just kick Caesar upstairs?'

'The classic masks of Comedy and Tragedy, or as they're now known, emoticons.'

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

"I'm having my entrails read."

Tragedy/Schadenfreude

'Caesar salad?'

"The sign ruins our surprise attack, but it's a big OSHA fine if we don't have it."

Sisyphus and coronavirus

"I've been reading a book of famous quotations. It's amazing how many are by a famous Greek named Anonymous."

Sharing the Bed with Zeno

Odysseus starts regretting his return to Ithaca.

Some Hamlet-based puns

"Is there a way to disable Narcissus' self-view?"

Bedtime in Ancient Greece

Souvenirs.

Situation Tragedy.

Take a break, Archimedes. A nice soak in the bath will work wonders.

"Hail, Caesar! The barbarians have been beaten back, and Rome is still Numero Uno."