Classic Style Seeker Gifts

Three tailors block the street, forcing a passerby into their shop.

Smoking jackets - 95 off.

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Mr. Punch's Fancy Ball

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

'Awright...Who's the dirty, lowdown varmint who's copyin' my plaid-shirt-and-stone-wash-jeans-with-matching-boots-and-vest ensemble?'

"Well, yes, it's not what you would call a practical nest, but my wife insisted on using an architect..."

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"And now. . . which shoes?"

Pampered and poodled.

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

Mister Pretty Shoes

"Let's try for dignified yet playful, while maintaining the spirit of preservation."

'Sure I'm late. . . I not only have to get ready for school. . . now I have to get ready in case some idiot takes my picture for YouTube.'

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

"I don't like your application."

"Some fitting room. Nothing fits!"

"Do you do much walking?"

Changing Room Decisions

'I'll take it!'

"The suit - it's rejecting your body."

Elegant woman in backless dress.

A member of a very populous consumer group attempts to go shopping...

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"Of course, lots of women are just going bare-headed."