Classic Entertainer Gifts

Ventriloquist and his dummy both on mobile phones.

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

A Guide to Balloon Animals

'He does.'

'So one day I thought, I'll teach you brats to laugh at me!'

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

"What's your occupation?"

Clown Wife

'It's not as easy as you think - saddle sores, bursitis in the shoulder, pigeons...'

'Oh, look - a juggling stilt-walker painting that little child's face!'

Baxter Higgleton, word balloon artist.

"Kid gloves, Hernandez. You gotta use kid gloves!"

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

'Send in the Clones.'

Glyndebourne

He'd attended Julliard and done Shakespeare in the park, and he never thought he'd sink this low, but there were bills to pay, and there weren't that many jobs out there for a bottle of seltzer water.'

"I keep having these funny moods, doctor."

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

Children's Entertainer

Clown walks balloon dog

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

Guy on stilts watching a balloon dog lift its leg on his stilts. Balloon animal maker watching on.

Crazy old clown cat lady.

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

"I got a banana peel to slip on. What did you get?"

'...Just because you hired me doesn't mean I have to entertain.'

The Amazing Mr Sausage

Once Again Jeff Had Put Too Much Helium In The Party Balloons.

Raging Bull on Ice

'Son I want you to Follow in My Footsteps.'

'Seriously folks...'

Why did I marry that clown?

"He didn't slip on even one of those peels..."

''...And they all lived slap-happily ever after.''

"It's depressing, people just don't take our work seriously."