City Storyteller T-Shirts

A man hoping that Temple bar will not be pulled down as it is the only barrier between him and the horrid City.

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

'What zip code are we in now?'

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

'Look dear, he's writing political speeches.'

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

Cash Machines From Across the Land

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'He was a handsome young prince when I married him.'

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

',,,And we'd really like a heart for the Tin Man,,,'

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

Airplane food

Childrens Books. This pop-up book would make a great 3-D movie!

'It wouldn't hurt to say a few words.'

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

"There's no way we can get him ow. He's completely under the covers."

'He's great, he can even fetch the paper. Off the neighbour's step.'

'Mom! Do they have traffic lights and stop signs in the sky?'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

'Don't be silly - the sun won't burn itself our for another 5 billion years. Bedsides, the Earth will have been smashed to smithereens by asteroids long before that.'

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

"Hang on! - we've possibly go another couple of films left in here!!"

Mother changing the words to 'this little piggy' to be more healthy

From Here You Can See Bugger All

"During our vacation my wife and I went to Paris while our suitcases went to Rome and Athens."

"A homeless person ate my homework."

Face it, Bob, we're lost. Welcome to Faceitbobwe'relost pop. 2.

"Start with a Spanish doubloon. Those are always good."