Church Music Gifts

Hallelujah!

'The vicar suggested an appropriate piece for next Sunday might be the Voluntary 'Redundancy'.'

'You're not what we hand in mind when we advertised for a new organist.'

'And if it ain't baroque, don't fix it.'

'Any requests? 'Amazing Grace,' perhaps?'

Organist

'Maybe we need to clarify the scripture about making a joyful noise.'

"We don't like the way you refer to them as 'hymns'."

Keyboard in Front of a Organ

Musician

Organ Player

"Turn to page 12 for our non-binary singalong."

"I know the organ is broken, but I was kind of hoping you knew how to play the guitar."

Christmas organ

Choirboys

Four Chanting Monks

"It's the new church organ."

Monk playing an organ.

Heavenly voices.

'Holy-Kanoly' makes his infamous 'Leap-of-Faith' jump.

Hildegard von Bingen

"Whose idea was it to start with the Hallelujah chorus?"

"...and I, Pastor Smith...preaching to you now from this pulpit, speak to you from experience about the 'strong-willed' child...BELIEVE me!"

"Can the folks in the nose-bleed section hear me alright?!"

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

'Due to our failure to secure a holiday-relief organisty, the next hymn will also be sung to the tune of Chopsticks.'

How's my sermon. . .

"As a member of the Sunday praise team you are not allowed to "change it up", whenever you feel led."

Nun Binning the Devil

"Since we now have a leaking roof problem, it might be a good time to schedule baptisms."

"Remember that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven

"That was a long three hours! I didn't know you had an extended service plan."

"Pastor Bob is the leader of the flock, son, not the herd."

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'

'And then the Lord proclaimed, in a loud, thunderous voice...'